He was not a man given to emotions
He never painted us pretty pictures
He knew life was tough and that
We had to be tougher
We never heard him say "I love you"
We were never hungry, never cold
We were never without a "home"
And to him this was "I love you"

We were never allowed to be unproductive
We always knew that after high school graduation
We would be responsible for ourselves
And to him this was "I love you"

As children we did not understand,
His way of saying "I love you"
And at times we wondered if he did

As we began to enter the world
And have children of our own
Not only did we know he loved us
We began to understand.

If anyone could honestly say "I did it my way"
My dad surely could
We resented this trait in him yet not one of us
Out of his eight children can stand today and
Say that since we left home we haven't lived
Our lives under the saying "I did it my way"

It was easy to fly from the nest
Because he never made it that comfortable
He detested weak people and he made sure
He was not sending eight weak adults
Out into this world.

Parents today are making the nest so
comfortable - padding every corner - that not
Only do their children not want to leave
They don't know how - and if they do leave
They still have their parents padding their
Corners and picking up the pieces.

We knew that if we got ourselves in a mess
We had better be able to get ourselves out of it!
I believe Daddy knew that he had to do this
Because he would not always be with us.

Daddy was twelve years old when his dad died
And at that young age he was on his own.
He taught us to be independent and
Self-sufficient without him. . .

He was tough. . . He never cried. . .
Odds to him were for horse races - Not for life!

He beat the odds in everything he undertook
Everything that came his way. . .
Then a vicious, degrading, destroying, non-caring
Disease called CANCER invaded his life.
The doctors said six weeks - two months
He set out to prove them wrong
He lost the battle but he won the war!

He fought a good fight, he kept the faith
During this fight, he learned to be humble
He learned to say "I love you" to each of us.
He learned how to cry, he learned that he finally
Needed someone and that someone was Jesus.
He accepted Jesus as His Saviour.
His nightmares of fighting snakes ceased
And he received peace within.

As my youngest brother told him
"The answers you don't find through the years,
You may find through the tears."

We cried the tears with him
Some of us cried on the outside
Some of us cried on the inside

We don't understand why he had to die this way
He did not understand!
But we do know that God is in control
And that He gave us the opportunity to have
A long goodbye. . .

Written by Charlotte Harp Lankford on the morning of April 25, 1986 before he died that night at 9:55 PM. The above was read at his funeral by Bro. Moore.

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I remember Daddy's hands
Folded silently in prayer
And reachin to hold me
When I had a nightmare
You could read quite a story
in the callouses and lines
Years of work and worry
Had left their mark behind.

I remember Daddy's Hands
How they held my mama tight
And Patted my Back
For something done right
There are things that I've forgotten
That I loved about the Man
But I'll always remember
The Love in Daddy's Hands

Daddy's Hands, Soft and Kind when I was crying
Daddy's Hands,Was hard as steel when I done wrong
Daddy's hands weren't always gentle
But I've come to understand
There was always love in Daddy's Hands

I remember Daddy's hands
Workin till they bled
Sacrificed himself sleep
Just to keep us all fed
If I could do things over
I'd live my life again
And never take for granted
The Love in Daddy's Hands

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Jonathan Lankford
English 101/109
Final Theme
18 March 1993

When someone asks a person to name their modern hero or heroine, it seems they immediately start thinking of which movie star or sports star to name. Heroes or heroines do not have to be people who are known to millions. The dictionary describes a hero or heroine as being a person admired for their courage, strength and achievements. The first person who comes to my mind is always my grandfather, who was known as Paw Paw Harp. Paw Paw Harp fits the dictionary's description of a hero. He will always be remembered for his courage, his strength and his achievements. Although Paw Paw Harp showed courage throughout his life, his greatest show of courage came in October 1985 when the doctors told him he had brain cancer. The doctors felt that he had only six weeks to live. Paw Paw set out to prove the doctors wrong. He refused to give up. He fought to live by undergoing radiation treatments. Paw Paw lived seven months after his prognosis instead of the six weeks that the doctors gave him. During this time, Paw Paw showed us great courage. He wanted to live yet he was never afraid to die. He talked of his upcoming death and wanted us all to be brave. He wanted us all to remember him but he wanted us to accept death as a part of life and to be ready to go on with our lives without him.

Paw Paw was a man of strength, both physically and mentally. Paw Paw was a jack-of-all-trades. He was a farmer, a mechanic, and a highway construction worker along with other trades requiring physical strength. He could outwork people half his age. In addition to his physical strength, he possessed great mental strength. At age twelve, his childhood came to an end. His father died and he had to quit school and go to work to help support his mother. He developed a strong positive attitude and grew up believing that anyone can do anything they have to do or want to do. He taught us that if life gave us lemons then we were to make lemonade instead of complaining. He taught us that we were all to be productive, independent and self-sufficient.

Paw Paw felt that his greatest achievement in life was his children and grandchildren. Paw Paw fathered and raised eight children, four sons and four daughters. He never painted his children pretty pictures. He knew from experience that life was tough and that they had to be tougher. He never allowed them to be unproductive. Paw Paw lived to see the fruits of his labor: one with her Ph.D. before age 30, one photographer, one engineer, two comptrollers, one secretary, one marketing rep and one computer analyst.

Although Paw Paw was proud of every one of his children, he felt that the icing on his cake was his grandchildren. At the time of his death, Paw Paw had sixteen grandchildren. No one could bring that twinkle to his eyes and smile to his face faster than his grandchildren could. I know because I was fortunate enough to be one of them. He helped me gain self-confidence by teaching me to believe in myself. He was always there when I needed him. Even though he died in 1986, he still lives in my heart today and will always be my hero.

Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free!
I'm following the path God laid for me.

I took His hand when I heard Him call,
I turned my back and left it all.

I could not stay another day.
To laugh, to love, to work or play.

Tasks left undone, must stay that way.
I found peace at close of day.

If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy!

A love shared, a laugh, a kiss
Ah yes! These things I too will miss.

Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.

My life's been full, I've savored much,
Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch.

Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don't lengthen it now with undue grief.

Lift up your heart and share with me,
God wanted me now, He set me free.

Author Unknown

Do not stand by my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glints on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn's rain

When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circled flight;
I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there
I did not die.

Author Unknown

To the living I am gone
To the sorrowful, I will never return
To the angry, I was cheated.

But to the happy, I am at peace
And to the faithful, I have never left.

I cannot speak, but I can listen
I cannot be seen, but I can be heard.

So, as you stand upon a shore,
Gazing at a beautiful sea
Remember me.

As you look in awe at a mighty forest
And its grand majesty
Remember me.

Remember me in your heart,
Your thoughts and your memories
Of the times we cried,
The times we fought,
The times we laughed

For if you always think of me,
I will never be gone from your side.

Author Unknown

Death is a season
We all must pass through
And just like the flowers,
God awakens us too
So why should we grieve
When our loved ones die,
For we'll meet them again
In a cloudless sky.

Helen Steiner Rice

May God Bless you always!

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